Thinking out loud

My New Life

Looking back, it's been quite a while since I voiced out my thoughts on this blog.

Quit my old job last October, finally I might say, been taking a 2 months vacation with no income. The first month is kinda enjoyable, with no need to wake up in the morning feeling glum and think of the things I'll be facing through the day. The second month is kinda boring, with nothing to do. If only I have 3 millions....

Got a new job now, up north of the country. Kinda nice change, new bosses (have a lot of managers now), better salary, more new things to experience, no traffic, even though the driving style of the people here sometimes drive me to the edge. But the best things is that the standard of living here is low compare to KL, and can get a BIG bottle of beer with just RM10. Life is great.

Chinese New Year is around the corner, so will be drinking throughout the new year, and hopefully, get to fatt choy as well, heh heh heh.

It's going to be JUNE soon

Unbelievable as it seems, it's been nearly half a year since I last complain about my life on this blog. Don't get me wrong, I still complain about my life throughout the time of absents in physical means, normally in verbal form.

June is coming. From Feb till now, it has been travelling around and working. Not much real work to be mention, but spending a lot of time on my butt in my car getting from one state to another is kinda boring. Currently, I'm experiencing the calm before the storm. If things goes as my boss has planned, then it would be outstation from second week of June till sometime in August. I'm starting to miss my bed. And not to mention the bloody water company will be earning my money for free.

Speaking of which, just my last water bill, it mention that my usage is somewhere within the range of RM3.xx but due to minimum charges, I need to pay RM12. I seriously considering to just let the tap to just run even when I'm not using. Bloody suckers, charging me so high.

Anyway, time to go back to work................Sigh

Year End

Ah, the holiday festive season for the last time of the year is arriving. Quality time to spend with families and friends that was neglected by a demanding job and ever more demanding boss. Time for looking back and see what a good year it has been. Looking forward to a new year with a new prospect. And for some, it might be the time for some last minute gift shopping.

For me, I believe that hopefully this year I could spend the holiday season sulking in my room while reflecting the year. Will not prepare a new resolution for the new year as there is no point in doing it while the one set 2 years ago was not even done yet. Probably will buy a lot of food and beverages to keep in the house as I would probably not be leaving it for days.

The year has not been kind, as I encounter problems after problems both with my career and my personal life. Make you think what there to look forward in a new year. For the past few days, I kinda enjoy the peaceful solitude that I bring myself. Alone with nothing much better to do than watching movies and drinking whiskey. The demanding routine during working hours really start to bug me as I need to stare at the laptop screens for hours.

All in all, I think I'll go for a peace, quite and lonely year end with a bottle of whiskey.

Wed, 22 Nov 2006

Just realised that the most difficult part about writing a blog is thinking about the title. So from now on, I just use the date as a title, unless I can managed to come out with something fancy. Try to write something for the past few weeks, but got stuck on the title. Every thoughts that came out sound to common or just not what I have in mind.

Currently will be base in my office until the project I'm on is finished, which probably will be next year. There is a break during christmas but that is because no one wants to work during that period of time.

Thanks to this "project", my boss has given the orders that I will not and should not travel for this whole period of time. That was about a month ago. 1 week later, I was instructed to travel to Ipoh for a week. Fun. When got back, the instruction was repeated. Let's see how long it last.

Don't actually have a lot more things to say, so let make this the end this time.

The Monday Blue's

For the first time in months I arrived in office on monday for the usual monday morning meeting. Find out that I don't miss it one bit. Added to the fact that have a very bad sleep, keep on having this dreams that I killed someone, whose face for some reason remain blank (would be a nice dream if I know who I killed). Then got these assignment that need to be done last weeks, emails to check and files, not to mention the small little thing of filing my claims for last 2 months.

And here I am, trying to snake while there are tonnes of job needed to be done. Emails are being downloaded even as I typed. Files are being copied to the server, curses flying each time I'm having an error message, and when things got tough, nicotine are use for calming the nerves so that not physical harm is inflicted to any office members, myself included.

Looking at days ahead, now that I face the shortage of manpower, which my boss happily told me to tough it over (summarise), I can just feel the sense of tiredness all over me. Sigh, sigh and sigh.

It has taken the time frame from morning to write this blog, and now still writing. And another error just popped up, the is no end to the problems facing me. Sigh. Think will just keep on working. Sigh.

Unmotivated

For the past few days, I feel like very unmotivated to work. Looking ahead, I saw only travellings that need to be done, which adds more reason to feel dismotivate myself.

Of all the talks and seminar that is going around that say that you can motivate yourself by saying those motivation phrase and things like that, I find most of them is not working on me. Keep on saying "I'll strike 3 million, I'll strike 3 million" doesn't seems to work. Still feels down, lonely and POOR. Currently, my best companions seems to be loneliness, beer and cigarettes. My PS2 seems to accompany me from time to time. Basically having no personal life, and looking at my own blog, no wonder I feel unmotivated. SIGH.....

My current life 2

Watch Superman Return on last Sunday. Kinda enjoyable movie as a whole. And what I wanted to brign out is that thanks to my new travelling schedule this year, I have been able to watch more movies in 1/2 year that compared to the the whole last 2 years. Too bad they didn't have that many good movies around for this year though. All the most anticipated or shall I say my most anticipated movies has been shown and now I only left Pirates to look forward to.

My new travelling schedule, which I noticed coem in effect sometime after Chinese New Year is that I would travel nearly the whole weekdays for nearly the whole month and be back to PJ on the weekends. So now I exceed my new petrol budget and max out on toll if not over every month since April, where the new budget was fixed. And since I exceed the budget, my company will deduct my performance incentives which they kept on insist that it is not to punish us. Yeah right. THEN GIVE ME MY RAISE! Oh, I forgot to mention that I did not have any salary raise this year. Instead my company say that they will give a performance incentive that is like a salary raise which is based on our performance which is subjected to management reviews. I WANT MY RAISE!

So now I try to supplement my income by coaxing my colleagues to buy me meals, which is to say until now is not successful. Anyone know how to hypnotise people? Would praise you if you could teach me the skill.

Friends

I believe a lot of people receive those emails from their friends saying they are their best friends, etc. and they should forward these mails to some people who they believe are the same. And should they not send back to the person who send to them, then it means that he/she do not think that person is a friend, etc.

I receive a few of these emails, never give more thoughts when saw it, then straight away click on the delete button. I believe that all these emails are from those spammers, which can keep track of where all these mails go. As like those mails that ask for donation, the internet providers can keep track of the mail. These spammers then can get our precious emails addresses and send mails asking us whether we want to enlarge our dear organ, etc. Of course this is only my thinking, and I have no facts to prove this. Only my personal point of view.

All that aside, personally I feel that for a friend, once in a while you keep in touch is enough for me. Frankly, something that I do not always do. So to all those that forward those type of mail to me, sorry that I don't send it back, it not that I don't think you are not my friend, is just for the reason stated above.

The Day after a Long Weekends

Took a day off last friday to enjoy a longer labour day weekend. Been quite a while since my last day off, if memory serve the last day off was for Chinese New Year holiday.

For Labour Day weekend, things are nice and easy. Sleep late, wake up late. Lingers around doing nothing. Things that reinforced my motivation that I should keep on hoping that I strike the lottery and quit my job. But until that day come, will need to keep on working. Makes me appreciate the labour day holiday more and more.

And I agree with some people to mention that the problem with long weekend is that I'm having monday blues on tuesday. Hmmm, on second thought, I'm having blues everyday, so doesn't really make a difference. So keep those long weekend coming.

Not motivate to continue writing, so think that would be it for this time. Should have labour day every months.

My current life

Last week, I was posted by my office for a supervision job at a place that are not far from KL, but it takes about 2 1/2 hours to reach. And just after the second day of work, I realised that I got sunburn on all the area of my body that are exposed to the torturing glare of the sun.

After so many jobs that are taken ever since I join this company, I have been working under the sun for countless time, yet this is the first time I got sunburn from work. And now due to the recovering process that has been going on, my skin itched like... well like some itchy.

Anyway, the main point of this block is actually, I have currently few projects in my hand that I need to handle, and two have already give me a constant headache. No wonder I have high blood pressure. And from the past two weeks, I gather that there are 3 possibility of main cause of death for me. It most probably will be lung cancer, brain cancer or high blood pressure. That is because I smoked a lot (according to some believe, smoking cause lung cancer, a believe which I think need to be dispute about), use the phone to handle others projects (it was said that the microwave signals from handphone damage a lot of brain cells), or from all the working strees. Or I might be bored to death as there is nothing to do during at night in the town as there is no place to go. Sigh, no wonder I do not have girlfriend.

Hope that all mention above entitle me to claim some illness from work benefit or something like that. Sigh.